I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize