If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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