Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
