Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
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