how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
