My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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