youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
