whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
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