More tranny stories later!
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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