i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
