i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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