I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
