508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
