if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i think i have herpe
just one?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
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