i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
there is puke in my bra ... again
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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