I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
