Screwed.edu
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Oh god it's open bar.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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