I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
