He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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