Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
