He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
