It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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