Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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