guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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