I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
