I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
