he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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