is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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