Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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