the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
