i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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