can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
