never play flip cup with pint glasses
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
