marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
