I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
operation have a gay friend backfired
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Randomize
