wrigley field is MILF paradise
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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