He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize