this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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