I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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