Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
