So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I have fence marks all over my body
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize