apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
It's rum buckets o'clock
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
