Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Terrible idea I love it
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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