Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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