when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
