Sponge bath it is.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Randomize