I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize