I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
