let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
