how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
