ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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